This is for you, Aai.
It took me a long time to write this for you.
When we met this summer, we had an argument.
Subject: Your beautiful and divine body.
You: I want to donate my body for scientific research. I trust you to respect my wishes.
Me: But why Mom?
You: In fact, I have made a declaration to the effect. I have lived all my life with utmost respect for science and its achievements in the medical field. I have given eyes for donation of all our relatives, including both my parents.
Me: Eyes, I can understand. They give sight. But why body?
You: Why not? Anyway you are going to burn it. So why not give it for someone to study?
Me: Because....because they cut it up, the thought itself is awful.
You: And burning it is pleasant?
Me: Burning the body has religious sanction. It is supposed to help the soul to carry on its journey, to not get stuck.
You: I am not in the least worried about my soul getting stuck.
Me: How can you be so sure?
You: When I had that accident when you were just eight years old, I remember looking at the stars and feeling so free and light.
Me: Well, I am not so confident. (Pause)
You: But its my body. I have the right to decide how I want to dispense it.
Me: No you don't. You are our mother. We have the all rights on you. Its my responsibility to make sure I do the best for you.
You: And if what you think is best for me goes against my wishes, would that be right?
Me: Yes. You are my mother and I will not let anyone touch you. And you are the least complaining mom I have ever known, you have no health problems, you are so cheerful and chirpy, so there is no point in this discussion.
You: Why don't you ask your Guru?
Me: I know what my Guru will say. He has in fact taught me the value and importance of rituals and traditions.
You: But I want to ask him. Can you at least ask him for me?
Me: Ok, I will ask.
I must admit here, Aai, I met Swamiji three four times since I came back to bangalore, but I didnt ask him. But I think Swami might have a thing for you. Because finally, he grabbed me by the neck and told me.
"I completely acknowledge, encourage, welcome, any organ donation....It does not affect the journey of the soul if the body is not properly burnt or buried....Just look at the possessiveness, it goes on after death also..."
I still don't like the idea, but I respect your wish, Aai. You have raised us with too much freedom and respect.
Just bless me that I may touch your beauty, your grace and your guts. Always and forever.
your loving daughter,