Saturday, February 21, 2009
How to make authors of your daughters
mum: The local newspaper man is coming to talk to me.
me: Why? You didn't pay the newspaper bill or what?
mum: No. To interview me. I am a mother of two published writers.
me: Cool. Enjoy. Happy Birthday.
mum: But what should I say?
me : just answer his questions mum.
mum : No. Prepare me. tell me what he will ask.
me: well, ok. he will ask you how to make authors out of your daughters.
mum: then what shall i say?
me: ummm...tell him how you encouraged us to read books, how you never disturbed us when we were into Gone with the Wind, how we stayed up discussing movies, how we sang songs on the scooter...
me: and, that you gave us the freedom to chose our professions. you had immense faith in us.
mum: yes. and?
me: and you supported us financially through our starving artists phases.
mum: need I mention that?
me: absolutely, you must. think of all the other starving artists' parents who will read the paper. there are lots.
mum: ok. and?
me: And the most important: you are my fan. That you loved my book, from before it was born. How I used to send you chapters by email.
mum: yes. I do love your book. Ok, bye, he is here.
me: Wait, you can give an excerpt from my novel. on page..( I go get the grasshopper).. page 65, when Gopika remembers her mother after seeing a lot of milk at the Amul Milk Factory and writes her that senti letter.
This is to remind you that you are my first original dairy of warm, fresh, pasteurized, sweetened, unlimited free milk. Maybe someday I will thank you , but may that day never come. I have never seen so much milk in my life.
I am at the Amul Milk Cooperative, making my first independent documentary film.
I can see that everything is Maya, but you are Mum.
mum: ok, what else?
me : mmm... he might ask you how come both your daughters wrote novels. Tell him, how you encouraged a healthy sense of competition between us.
mum: I did no such thing. You were always jealous of her.
me : look, I am a launch old. I know what I am talking about. Can you tell him that I wrote this novel out of jealousy? I can, but can you?
me: Then be politically correct.
mum: but even if I encouraged you both, blah blah, you couldn't have written and gotten published unless you both had the talent.
me: yes, and more than that, we have the blessings of the Muse.