Monday, December 15, 2008

Birds and bees

'You know Ai, the ear drum is only two centimeters inside the ear.' said my little boy at the dinner table this evening.

'Really? I didn't know that.'

'Yes. My teacher only told. And, therefore, you should never never put a stick inside the ear because the eardrum will break and it will be very painful.' he shudders for effect.

'Yes, you are right. Your teacher is a smart lady, she knows so much, na? What else did you learn in class today?' I am impressed at his ability to recall and vocalize all these details.

As usual, I get impressed too fast.

'And a little girl can have a little baby. A very small baby.' He shows his palm.

'No, Kiddo. Little girls cant have babies.'

'My teacher only told. You don't know, Ai. Its there in all the body parts. Its very small in a little girl.'

'No, Pavan, little girls cant give birth.'

'But my teacher told...'

'Your teacher told you wrong! Or you learnt it wrong, more likely.' Why was I shouting? Thankfully the phone rang and he ran to answer it.

Leaving me alone to ponder on an important parenting step.

Was it Dr. Spock who said that a question must be answered when it is asked? When it is so difficult to get him to understand phonetics of spelling, I am at a total loss as how to explain about the birds and bees.

Should I pass on the job to Papa?

Wouldn't it be better to do it together?

Oh, boy, we are going to have to prepare for this class. Anyone out there have any idea how to explain the facts of life to an eight year old?


Space Bar said...

Didn't you get asked this question one way or the other for a long time? My son frequently asks how he was born but he hasn't yet asked how babies are made (I've been waiting for that one for some time now, though I'm not sure how I'd answer it!)

I've told him about his breech c0section birth. He asks if he can go back in (how Freudian is that?!) and I say, sorry boss, there's no going back, ever!

Do they teach stuff like that already in your son's class? Mine's learning about leaves and things.

SloganMurugan said...

All z best1

JOY said...

start writing about the son and his teacher , it shall be a good novel to read.

JOY said...

start writing about the son and his teacher , it shall be a good novel to read.

Grasshopper said...

Space bar,
How old is your son? And, do you have a TV at home?
Mine knows that kids come out of their mother's stomachs, but hasn't yet asked how they get there. :)

Sri said...

I never asked my Parents Proficient questions except I was curious Why i was not there in their Wedding Album.
And their answers never convinced me until i was 12 or 13 ;)
I have no ideas about Parenting but Just want to remind you that there's a Chicken Soup Book on Parenting.
Good Luck!

Dee said...

My then 5 year old opened up the visual encyclopedia, read up on it and came up and told me he now knows how babies are made. He never did question me again and am not really sure how much he understood. He is now 7 but if he asks me, I know my reply. Go read up again! Atleast I avoid the talk.

Grasshopper said...

Guys, ladies, has none of you ever been explained or had to explain this whole jingbing to anyone?

Can I please have a little more enlightened comments?

Dee, your five yr old can read? I am impressed. Maybe I should take spelling tips from you.

Space Bar said...

My son's 8. Yes, there's a TB at home, but since I don't watch it, my son lands up not watching TV either.

I was explained everything in what I then thought was unnecessary and graphic detail by my mother. I was 10 and had asked a question I didn't think merited such a detailed answer and was grossed out enough to not ask any more.

My son hasn't asked a direct question yet. When he does, I'll have to figure it out. :D

navjyoti said...

Hey Manju, first get hold of his teacher and check what in the world did she say to the kids! She has to take care of what messages she may give out consciously or unconsciously!

About answering his question, I agree with Dr. Spock. Clarify to him what the teacher meant after checking with her and telling him you did so. However, your comfort level with the topic will determine his clarity and comfort level on the same. So I suggest you go only as far as you can confidently take it, tell him that the rest can be understood and appreciated only when he is older. Give him some analogy like trying to explain to a 6 month old baby that 10 and 10 is 20. In the same way, he will not understand even if you explain certain things right now. And that he can let it rest for now, since that information wont be of any use to him at the moment.

You are the best judge of what he is ready for and in what way. Just follow your instinct!

Grasshopper said...


Thank you so much.

You are more than his first teacher. You are more of a Godmother.